I didn’t know how to title this post. So, I’m just not titling it. I’m basically “in flux”. Life does go on. I’m witnessing it. I crawled out of bed, I made it back to work. I started realizing that I needed to move on with my life. I couldn’t hibernate forever. There will come a time when I’m completely back to myself, I’m just not there yet, I do hope that is soon… I know I have several people supporting me also. I am learning to appreciate the moment…
My heart is very much still in pain. I still think about my baby girl every single day. I don’t know how to not think about her. – I very much believe that is what I have to learn. I have to learn, not to think about her first. This is so hard. I suppose when you decide to have a baby you sign up for this (the good, and the possible very bad), but holy hell, this is so freaking hard. My heart is in so much pain and I just want it to be better.
